Presidents' Songs

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    About time we recorded the Presidents’ songs for posterity.


    2008 – Jonathan McCloy – Spancil Hill

    2009 – Darryl Wright – started a new tradition this year as Darryl didn’t have a song organised. A song was written in about 5 minutes to the tune of ‘Lola’. THe full words are lost, but it didn include

    ‘His name is Darryl, some say he looks like Colin Farrell. It’s an easy mistake for climbers to make.’

    ‘Hills, hills, hills – they’re better than pills’

    2010 – Colleen Mann – ‘I Wish I was a Punk Rocker with Flowers in My Hair’. Conventional lyrics. Sigh.

    2011 – Rónán Kernan – The Trad Climber (to the tune of ‘The Wild Rover’)

    I’ve been a trad climber for many’s a year

    I’ve spent all my money on trad climbing gear

    And now I’m returning the gear to the store

    And I never will be a a trad climber no more


    And it’s no, nay, never

    No nay never no more

    Will I play the trad climber

    No never, no more


    I went into a Cotswolds I use to frequent

    I told poor aul’ Angus me money was spent

    I asked him for tricams he answered my nay

    Broke climbers like you are in here every day


    I then took from my pocket a gold camalot bright

    And Angus’ eyes opened wide with delight

    He said we have quickdraws and helmets the best

    And that cam that you showed me is surely the best


    I’ll go to El Chorro, climb something tough

    And I’ll go sport climbing ’til I’ve had enough

    McCloy says it’s shite but he’s such a bore

    Then maybe I’ll do some trad climbing once more


    2012 – Niall Browne – Climbing on Binnian (to the tune of Breakfast at Tiffany’s)

    Niall, do you have the words?


    2013 – Stuart Abraham – I’ll Tell Niall’s Ma (I’ll Tell Me Ma, obviously)

    I’ll tell Niall’s Ma when I go home

    The climbers won’t leave the rocks alone

    They pulled my gear, they stole my cam

    But that’s alright, cos I can jam


    Jaysus boys this gear is shitty

    Hope I get back to Belfast city

    I ve got some tricams size 1, 2, 3

    But they’re all miles below me


    Stephen Rooney says he loves her

    …can’t remember the rest of this verse


    Let the wind and the rain and the hail fuck off

    O’Hagan fell in a Scottish loch

    Dyno Steve’s a human fly

    With many daft problems for you to try

    When you get some gear of your own

    You won’t tell your ma you’ve spent all your loan

    Let them all come as they will

    ‘Cos it’s Stephen Rooney Niall’s ma love still!


    Stuart, d’you remember the rest?


    2014 – Stephen Rooney – something? What was it?

    • This topic was modified 6 years, 3 months ago by RonanK.


    A fine singing voice there Niall!



    This is a brilliant idea.

    We should ask Daryl if he still has the words


    I missed Rooney’s song, so if anyone has a recording it would be most welcome 😀




    Iris by the Goo Goo Dolls


    Well I’d give anything for some good gear

    I’m run out, my hands are so sore

    If I fall now it’s certain that I’m gonna deck

    As certain as that Niall is a whore

    And all I can think as I’m shaking

    Is Ronan looks like he’s 44

    And now that Natasha is preggers,

    Jordan’s freedom has flown out the door



    Yes I live the life of a climber

    So penniless and dirty and strange

    And I’m often left thinking I’m crazy

    But I know that I’m not gonna change


    Now you can’t fight off Matt Boy’d advances

    ‘Cause Rohypnol’s a marvellous thing

    We’re sure it’s how Gilmore got Roisin

    And we’re still not sure which way Grew swings… Smiley




    Well Campbell’s just a fuckin’ weirdo

    He’ll die if he eats anything

    Alex is a wizard and Cadden’s an ape

    And O’Hagan drinks a lot that’s a sin (He loves Jesus!)




    Yes I live the life of a climber

    So penniless and dirty and strange

    I know that my friends are all weirdos

    But there’s not one of them I would change


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